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The Real Key To Getting Over Your Partner’s Past

Let’s say you want to build a house. So you go the bank and take out a loan. You buy a plot of land. You buy lumber, siding, concrete, etc. You find some house-building books and plans, and talk to...

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The Difference Between Normal Jealousy and Obsessive Jealousy

Let me clear something up right off the bat: I don’t like the word “normal.” What the hell is “normal” anyway? And who’s to say what’s “normal” and what’s not? And why do so many of us aspire to be a...

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Get my new e-book for FREE on Amazon (for a limited time!)

Today’s the day! After several months of revisions, editing, mulling it over, crumpling up and tossing drafts into the wastebasket, walking over to the wastebasket and de-crumpling, etc. I’m pleased to...

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Overcoming Feelings of Loneliness and Neediness in Relationships

NOTE: The following is an excerpt from my newly released e-book, Everyday Joy: Or, How To Be Happier and Healthier, and Party All The Time. Although this article does not deal with retroactive jealousy...

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VIDEO: “Help! What should I do if I run into my partner’s ex??”

Greetings from beautiful Chiang Mai, Thailand! Lately I’ve received a lot of emails from readers asking about what to do when/if they encounter what I call “trigger” people… A “trigger person” is...

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VIDEO: Try This Quick And Easy Gratitude Exercise For Overcoming Retroactive...

A few months ago I began a daily gratitude journal (which might sound hokey and new-agey, but bear with me…) The results were interesting to say the least. My experience with my gratitude journal...

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Why Memories From Your Partner’s Past Don’t Really Exist

Occasionally I get e-mails from readers who are troubled by their partner’s past memories of former lovers. Some people are worried that their partner may look back fondly on their former lovers, or...

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5 Books That Will Help You Overcome Retroactive Jealousy

When I was suffering from retroactive jealousy, I checked out a lot of books that I hoped might provide me with some relief. Some were very good, others were just OK, and many others weren’t helpful at...

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Setting Non-Negotiables: A Simple Way To Get Serious About Self-Improvement...

Happy New Year from Chiang Mai, Thailand!  I originally posted this article over on my personal website, but I thought it would be appropriate to share here as well. If you’re suffering from...

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Is Sexual Jealousy Natural?

When dealing with retroactive jealousy it’s tempting to go down the intellectual rabbit hole in an attempt at arriving at some clarity, peace of mind, direction. Although I’ve argued that it can be...

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“I Can’t Stop Stalking My Wife’s Past On Facebook:” Retroactive Jealousy And...

In many ways there’s never been a better, or worse, time to be dealing with retroactive jealousy. Unlike decades earlier, with the advent of the internet the average RJ sufferer can find a wealth of...

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“Am I Dealing With Retroactive Jealousy, Or Conflicting Values?”

Since I launched this site two years ago, hundreds of people have written to me asking the same question in different ways. That question goes something like this… “My partner is amazing in every other...

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How Being Vulnerable Can Help You Overcome Retroactive Jealousy

A few months ago I broke my face. Well, not my whole face, but a crucial part of my face, anyway. One wrong turn on a motorbike in Thailand, and I ended up fracturing my nasal bone, leaving a healthy...

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Sleep: Your Secret Weapon For Overcoming Retroactive Jealousy

About a year ago, one of my closest friends became a father for the first time. And ever since, between running his own business, being forced to travel regularly, trying to maintain a healthy...

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“Chasing Amy” and Retroactive Jealousy

For a condition that affects so many people around the world at one time or another, there aren’t many books, songs, and films that deal with retroactive jealousy. With some notable exceptions–John...

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Mailbag: How Do You Compete With Your Partner’s Ex?

When you hear the word “settling,” what comes to mind? “Settling down?” “Settling for someone?” “Settling in?” What? When I hear the word “settling,” I cringe. To me, “settling” in the context of...

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VIDEO: “Does Your Partner’s Past Matter?”

I woke up this morning to discover that the enrolment for my online course “Get Over Your Partner’s Past” is currently sitting at 300 (!) students. That’s a lot. This is more than I could have hoped...

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Why Memories From Your Partner’s Past Don’t Really Exist

Occasionally I get e-mails from readers who are troubled by their partner’s past memories of former lovers. Some people are worried that their partner may look back fondly on their former lovers, or...

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Use The 80-20 Principle To Overcome Retroactive Jealousy Twice As Fast

Over a century ago, an Italian economist unlocked one of the most powerful, universally-applicable principles for achieiving growth and success ever discovered. And it was all thanks to his garden. His...

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Mailbag: When A Jealous Boyfriend Won’t Admit He’s Jealous

Today’s letter comes to us from a South African reader we’ll call “M,” whose jealous boyfriend won’t admit that he’s jealous: Dear Zachary, My boyfriend has retroactive jealousy and has admitted he...

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